GOD IS A REPUBLICAN

The Madison Police Department is one of more than 100 police agencies withdrawing from agreements to send personnel to bolster security at next month’s Democratic National Convention in Milwaukee

Silent scenarios close captioned via body language. Deaf assumption deciphered ambient melodies and what was the transference of Beethoven’s quill to bombastic inflections? Moonlight glutted the barriers of invisible darkness separating trees, stoplights and lampposts. Footsteps formulated false jazz rhythms and Dorothy Parker planned to collapse under the weight of her sing-song-praise for all things poetic…

Police Chief stands behind his outdoor podium, sunlight reflects off his gold badge and dances a speck of light across the faces of reporters stationed in the front row. His comb-over breaks and strands of hair frolic in the wind like dandelion seeds escaping their host. He leans forward and speaks into his microphone, PA crackles and decorates his voice as if he’s been smoking for years. 

“Ladies and gentlemen of the press corp,” he pauses, “I am here to announce that God is indeed…real…” 

Crowd gasps in unison. 

“How can you be so sure!” Tom from Fox News questions. 

“God parted the clouds the other day and told me. He said…Jim…I don’t want you to provide security for the Democratic National Convention.”

“Why would God say that?” Tom asks.

“Isn’t it obvious?” He asks. “God’s a republican.” 

Published by akcola

because the end is profitable

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